She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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