Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
