That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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