We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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