Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
