I have demons in me.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
