yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
