who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
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