So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Randomize
