i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Randomize
