Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Randomize
