I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
