Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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