Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
