Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
