didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
