it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
