i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
