she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
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