1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
