You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
