if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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