She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Randomize
