Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize