Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
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