You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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