Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Hippo gnu deer
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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