dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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