We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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