Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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