found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Semen is not good for contacts.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize
