last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
