It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
