Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
