Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
