Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
