I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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