I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
