Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
