My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
