Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
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