My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize
