I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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