So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
