I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize