He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
