You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
