Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
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