You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
