I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
