Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
