I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
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